You are good enough, just as you are

The story of not being good enough is an oldie but not a goodie. It is a reoccurring theme that I hear from quite a few clients and people in conversation. It’s something we all too often say about ourselves and leave unquestioned.

This has left me wondering where it comes from? Is it from being compared to a brighter sibling during our early years? Does it come from seeing others outperform you professionally? Or could it possibly be a self-inflicted torture from being unforgiving towards ourselves when we make a so-called mistake?

I know I am sometimes challenges by the thought that I am not a good enough …. (insert a social role of choice).  But I remind myself that this is just an age old, universal story not grounded in truth.  And who was I comparing myself to in the first place?

You are exactly where you need to be

Comparing yourself to others is a true destroyer of well being. It can cut you to the quick.  But what if you accept the premise that you are exactly where you need to be, not where you think you should be? This can be beautifully liberating if you let it.

What if we could just accept that we are perfect as we are?  Not broken or dysfunctional but just fine. I love the concept of being divinely perfect.  It means we can still have perceived flaws or struggles but essentially we’re perfect just for being ourselves.  And this makes you and me enough,yes, perfectly good enough.

Anna xxx

Being Brave

Now’s the time to be brave.  To believe in yourself and your worth and to speak up.

It’s so easy to get caught in self-doubt and fear but what do they serve?  They serve to keep you small and safe (thank you ego). And where does that lead to? Nowhere great, hey?

I know that I have some challenges about shining my light but here I am writing another blog post for anyone to see.

Everyday life requires all types of courage: making a phone call you’ve been dreading, promoting your business or asking someone out. However courage is like a muscle, the more you use it, the stronger it gets.

If you can recognise courage in others, this means you then possess it within yourself. Give yourself credit for that. If I think about it, I can make quite a long list of my brave efforts (raising children on my own, going back to study as a mature age student, starting my own business…)

According to Justin Moikeha Asar, creator of The Liquid Crystals, Chrysoprase is the crystal of Fearless Movement.  It is represented by the animal totem of the deer and results in your “Crown, Heart and Solar Plexus Chakras working in harmony to direct life in a fearless manner due to the presence of spirit, unconditional love and understanding of self without ego.”

Five easy steps to being your best brave self:

  1. Know that there are people who need to hear exactly what you are saying (so speak your truth).
  2. As the old maxim goes, the journey of a 1,000 miles begins with a single step (go on,
    Photo by Christopher McNeill

    you can do it).

  3. Ask yourself what you have to lose and compare it to with what you have to gain (things are never as bad as you fear them to be).
  4. Just do it, whatever it is (and give yourself a pat on the back regardless of the outcome).
  5. Hold your hand on your Solar Plexus Chakra to activate your personal power.

If you feel poised but not quite ready to take a leap of faith, maybe a kinesiology session is just what you need. Feel free to get in touch with me to have a preliminary chat. And, drum roll please, I have reduced my session price by 50% until the 21st of March 2017).

Anna xxx

 

How to listen to your divine feminine

Recently I found myself in an intensely masculine environment and my reaction was to dissociate and leave it. I wish I had known other ways of dealing with it. Instead of freaking out about the exterior world I always had the choice to go within.  To go deep and find that place within me that knows flow, peace and love.  This is how my divine feminine is and it’s so very curious that I chose to overlook her. It’s takes presence and faith to know that all that we seek really does lie within us.

Our divine feminine resides in our heart.  She is not loud and rowdy but she is strong, oh so strong and you really do need to tune in to her and listen. Be patient when seeking answers.  Time doesn’t matter so much here. The divine feminine knows courage, grace and nurturing. She stands opposed to fear and aggression.

As the mother of two little ones, I am often in my head and the masculine mode of doing.  Just getting the kids to school takes so much doing. But how would it look if we took a more feminine route?  If I as their mother, modeled that it’s really rather easy.  It’s an approach that would hopefully reduce much stress for all of us.  And this in itself, means it’s worth a go.

Wishing you all happy flow and peace. Anna xxx

Stop Doubting and Start Doing

I’ve been on quite an emotional roller coaster lately and it’s rattled me in many ways. Questions are raging: “What have I done? Who am I? Do I have what it takes to pursue my dreams?

Self doubt and fear (friends from way back) are inviting themselves back into my world.  But then I ask myself “What do you think you’ve been doing all these years and doing well?”

I’ve brought two wonderful children into the world and raised them on my own.  I’ve returned to study and achieved a Diploma in Kinesiology.  My open-minded GP has referred clients to me.  I moved myself and the kids interstate to follow my heart only to find that it’s not there that we belonged.

I’ve been knocked down many times but here I am, a little weary but still optimistic, still standing, still open to wondrous new possibilities.

It’s time for me to shine again.  Time for me to speak my truth a little louder.  In my heart I know that we are all magnificent beings but so many of us are too scared to realise and claim it.

It’s time for me to stop doubting and start doing.  And how about you? Just take one small, positive step and see what happens.  Go on, I dare you. xxx

The act of letting go

Yesterday I set myself a ‘letting go’ challenge. The reluctance to let go has been on an ongoing theme in my life (relationships past their use by date, stepping out with my light blazing etc). The challenge was physical but I felt it had far reaching consequences.

Every Tuesday I take my kids to an indoor climbing and trampolining centre. While my daughter does aerial cadets training (fancy name for trampolining), my boy quite happily scampers up 5 metre tall walls and stepping poles, lets go of the wall and peacefully floats back to earth.

The first time I tried this a few months ago I could quite easily climb to the top of the wall but when faced with the letting go, I just couldn’t. Instead of floating down, with a sweating, extremely adrenaline fueled body and pumping heart, I just climbed down again. I did not feel great about that but it seemed an easier option than the terror of letting go.

Yesterday, before I even got to the climbing place, I set myself the intention of embracing the act of letting go. So there I was metres above the ground poised to let go of the wall and just float back down. And you know what, I still couldn’t do it. I then asked staff what’s the easiest way to just let go and he replied, “Just let go.” Still not so happy or confident, I held on. It was when he said he’d count for me and that I could release my iron grip on the wall on “three”, that I finally managed to do that. The letting go was still terrifying for that split second before I felt the beautiful tension of the rope engaging as I started to drift down. The downward descent was so sweet. I wish it went for an hour.

Inspired to master this act of letting go, I kept climbing and descending. Did the letting go get easier? Not really, but I kept doing it anyway. In the words of the Australian vernacular, “I had a go.”  Good on me.  xxx
womanbelievinginself

You have all the time in the world

I love the idea that nothing is fixed. Don’t like your job?  How about leaving?  Want to experience adventure? Buy a boat and sail up the coast of Australia (hey Jude and Steve).  Looking for a new way to support your family?  Return to full time study at the age of 48 (hey me).

It was once told to me that the best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago.  The next best time is today.  So what are you waiting for?
change our minds

Stopping the self abuse

I do believe one of my biggest life lessons is to stop being so bloody hard on myself.

To a vast extent I have achieved this, mainly with the help of a lot of soul-searching, personal development and kinesiology.

The funny thing is, that before I became a mother I actually thought I was doing okay and my self-esteem was in the healthy range.  But after becoming a mum, and setting myself impossibly high standards, my healthy self-esteem bottomed out as self loathing.  So how did such a major shift happen?

A lot has to do with expectations.  I expected that I would be the perfect mum after seeing myself as  both a good daughter and a good partner (please note that I didn’t say perfect).  I didn’t realise at the time, that this was pure craziness and impossible to achieve.  So instead of thriving as an indie (solo) mum, I just beat myself up every time I fell short of being perfect.  Silly, I know.

Did I hold other mothers to such high standards?  Of course not, so why did I make an exception for myself? I think it comes back to being both a perfectionist (and now, thank goodness, I’m a former perfectionist) and a Virgo desperately trying to hang on to control in the face of domestic chaos. As a new mum, all of a sudden I had this precious being to nurture and protect. Loving her was so easy but when my little darling did not get the recommended amount of sleep, I automatically assumed that I was doing something wrong.  A trying case of post natal anxiety did not help either. And could I make my daughter sleep more? Hell no, and hence my ensuing despair and self recrimination. Just writing this I can feel the former tension rising in my body.

Three years later and after the birth to my beautiful son, it was declared by one of the midwives that I had split abdominal muscles.  So in the weeks and months following his birth, I dutifully did the recommended exercises to try to rectify the issue.  Try as I would, the muscles did not get much closer.  Instead of celebrating this and the fact that I had a carried and delivered a healthy, bouncing boy without any drugs or intervention, I criticised my body for letting me down.  It was just another case of personal, and this time physical, failure and opportunity for me to be harsh to myself. Did it help?  Not in the slightest.  In the end, after about six months of religiously doing the exercises, the hospital staff just advised me to let them go.

Fast forward another five years and I have just recently had my unruly locks permanently straightened.  As I was sitting at the hairdressers and surveying the result I stopped myself from thinking, “Great new hair but shame about the face.” Instead I sent myself a loving thought.  Some self kindness at last.  Hooray.

 

Go on, use your courage

I am feeling so inspired by doing Marianne’s on-line Aphrodite Training.  I think she has amazing depth and knowledge.  When my daughter is of a suitable age I’ll be pointing her in the direction of it.

Thought I’d share with you this beautiful quote.

marianne quote

Standing peacefully in your personal power

 

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While we were getting ready for school and kinder today, my beautiful five-year-old son had a meltdown over a perceived theft from his recent pinnata booty.  Rather than react with more emotion, I chose a more peaceful response.  I just put my hands over my solar plexus chakra and stood in my personal power with a loving heart.

The solar plexus chakra is our centre for peaceful, personal power and if we’re feeling threatened or attacked in any way it’s really helpful to put our hands over it (check out my chakra post if you would like more information).

After the tantrum finished, I asked my boy if he would like a hug and he just melted in my arms.  A very beautiful end to a morning challenge.

The wonderful world of chakras

Two months ago, the final class of my Diploma in Kinesiology was about chakras and auras and I loved every minute of it. The common idea of a chakra is a vortex of energy in the shape of a spinning, spiral shaped wheel.  Modern mystic Belinda Davidson describes chakras as being our willing workers which help us in all areas of our life. She writes, “Each one of your chakras energetically fuels and sustains aspects of your life and your body. They do this by receiving energy for your energy field from the universe and then transporting this energy into a certain area of your life and body. Think of the chakras as happy, eager, diligent workers, who spend all day looking after, managing and organising every aspect of your life.”

In kinesiology class we learnt there are seven major chakras and 21 one minor ones.  The first major chakra, located at the perineum, is the Base chakra and is all about our tribe, sense of belonging, physical survival and security. It is red in colour.

Just below our navel is our second chakra, the Sacral chakra and it concerns emotions, sexuality and addictions. It is orange in colour.

Third up is the Solar Plexus chakra. It’s under our rib cage and is yellow. It is related to our  thinking and where our personal power lies.  Tip: if you’re ever feeling verbally or emotionally attacked, hold your hand over your third chakra to activate your personal power.

The Heart chakra is next and its beautiful green energy is about love for self, forgiveness and compassion.  Being the fourth chakra, it is also the bridge between the lower and the upper chakras.

The Throat chakra, our fifth one, helps us to speak our truth as well as being true to ourselves.  Interestingly quite a few people have issues with this which sometimes has to do with being persecuted in a past life.

Our sixth chakra, our Third Eye or Brow one, is indigo or purple and it’s related to intuition, wisdom and insight. Psychic abilities are enhanced with a strong Third Eye chakra.

The last major chakra, our seventh one, is the Crown one and sits right on top of your head (while some people think it’s above your head).  This is our connection with the Divine and is coloured violet.

In Belinda Davidson’s School of the Modern Mystic, which I loved completing its Level One course, she also talks about the next five chakras ascending above your head.

Some interesting chakra facts:

  • Each chakra has a colour which corresponds to the colours of the rainbow and in the same order
  • Every chakra is connected to a layer in your aura
  • All the major chakras are related to one of the major endocrine glands: pineal, pituitary, thyroid, thymus, pancreas, adrenal and gonads
  • There are spiritual life lessons or challenges which relate to each chakra.  As you master each chakra’s challenge you gain power and self knowledge.

So how are your chakras feeling? A guide to knowing how well they are doing is to look at how you’re feeling and if there are some areas of your life which may need a boost.  If you’re feeling as if you’re on your own, your Base chakra may need attention.   If you find it hard to speak your truth, your Throat chakra may need some balancing.

If you sense that one or some of your chakras need help, either strengthening or reducing the energy of them, there are a variety of ways to do this: you can use crystals, meditation, surrounding or dressing yourself in the chakra’s colour and even by putting your hands over them you can draw extra energy into them.  In kinesiology school we were taught some really lovely and easy ways to restore balance.

 

Many thanks to Dr Bruce and Joan Dewe for chakra knowledge shared in class notes for VEF 302. Thanks also to Kristyna Matkova for her magical photo. Copyright: <a href=’http://www.123rf.com/profile_matahiasek’>matahiasek / 123RF Stock Photo</a>